FRATERNAL CORRECTION

 A MESSAGE FOR THE 15TH SUNDAY AFTER PENTECOST

When it comes to observing the faults of others, most of us have no problem in seeing everything.  Even here in this very building, we notice when someone comes to church not dressed properly, when certain people always arrive late, whose babies cry the loudest, which children don’t make the correct genuflection on two knees when passing the altar after the Consecration.  If the things that happen are genuinely offensive to God, I would ask you to take the necessary steps to stop it from happening on a regular basis.  But here, we run into difficulty, don’t we?  We who notice everything, we who might even point out the bad behavior of others by gossiping to our own family and friends about it—suddenly, we’re not so keen on correcting the person or persons responsible.

However, it is an act of charity to do so, and is called “fraternal correction.”  This is an act by which we charitably try to watch over the souls of others by trying to draw them closer to God and away from their sinfulness or poor conduct.  It’s a delicate thing to do, and must never be done out of anger, frustration or a sense of power and control over others.  It must always be motivated with selfless love of neighbor, the hope that our correction may be effective and not personally offensive to the person whose conduct we are trying to improve.

These considerations make for certain rules that govern our methods of correcting others.  The first is never to correct someone publicly.  If I singled out one of you by name from the pulpit and yelled at you because your phone rings during Mass, this would be inexcusable on my part, no matter how mad I might be!  In a case like this, the embarrassment of the interruption is usually itself enough of a correction to the offender.  If not, I would perhaps need to take the person aside discreetly to remind them how to handle this in future.  Nor do we ask our ushers to inspect your clothing to make sure it’s appropriate.  I rely on your good taste, modesty, and respect for the presence of God on the altar, to come to Mass in your “Sunday best,” and if I have to mention it to anyone, it should never be from the pulpit.

So we see that discretion is essential in correcting others.  Even our own children, though they must be firmly corrected at all times, are sensitive to being corrected in front of others.  In their case, it may sometimes be necessary, as the presence of witnesses may be more effective, increasing their fear of being embarrassed in front of others so they behave better in future.  At other times, the simple whisper of “Wait till I get get you home!” is enough to supply a different and even more effective kind of fear.  For adults, however, fear is more likely to take the form of resentment, and that drives people away—from us, from the church, from religion, even from God.  So depending on your relationship with the person you’re correcting, you need to vary your approach appropriately, and always so they’re aware of your good motives.  The last thing they’re going to appreciate is some “busybody” butting in with some holier-than-thou observations about how bad they are!

As St. Paul observes in today’s Epistle, “Brethren, if a man be overtaken in a fault, ye which are spiritual, restore such an one in the spirit of meekness; considering thyself, lest thou also be tempted… for if a man think himself to be something, when he is nothing, he deceiveth himself.”  So meekness and humility should also be part of our corrections, conscious always of our own faults and imperfections, and never looking down upon the behavior of others.  We’re told to “love the sinner but hate his sin” and that is not always so easy to do.  Our constant awareness of our own lack of merit should help though, and the person we’re correcting should never feel we consider ourselves to be his moral superior.  Pride goeth before a fall.  Let’s all be prepared to correct (and to be corrected by) others, and “do good unto all men, especially unto them that are of the household of faith.”